Dream Killers & Self-Sabotage


Do you ever feel like you’re letting your tribulations get the best of you? Even when you recognize this behavior pattern and you know better? It’s tough sometimes when you have bipolar disorder or depression and you can see that you self-sabotage something good in your life, something that is working FOR you, as opposed to working AGAINST you. Why do we do this self-sabotaging?

Well there are many reasons we self-sabotage. To begin, we are scared. Scared of failure, of course, but also scared of success. If we are used to failing, and there is a chance we might succeed or win, that notion of stepping out of our element, into a new territory, is frightening. It’s uncomfortable. It also feels very vulnerable.

For those of us dealing with bipolar disorder, we know how quickly positive things can become unraveled. We might allow ourselves to go after what we want. If we’re manic, we might gather what we want and then some! But then sometimes there is that familiar pattern of taking something that is so beautiful and precious which we have acquired, earned, or won, and then in an instant- we destroy its very existence, leaving us alone or into a downward spiral of despair and aftermath.

These experiences prevent us from going after our dreams or making new, positive goals. I know I struggle with finding my passion, my dreams. I, like many others tangled in the twines of the manic and the depressive minds, becomes unsure of what is real and what isn’t real. Every day I work a little harder to achieve greatness, and to chase those dreams.

This image is something I found inspiring and motivating. Enjoy.


Interview with Stephanie Schroeder, Author of “Beautiful Wreck”

Read fellow blogger Hot Femme in the City’s interview with Stephanie Schroeder, author of “Beautiful Wreck”. This memoir is about a lesbian living in New York City, struggling with undiagnosed Bipolar Disorder and Tourettes. A first of it’s kind, this book deals with both lesbian situations and lgbt culture, as well as the realities of mental illness. Highly recommended read.

Interview with Stephanie Schroeder, Author of “Beautiful Wreck”.


I decided to start this blog because I know there are many of you out there who are just as crazy as I am, or just as concerned about mental health issues as I am. I am an advocate for Bipolar Disorder support and awareness. I have Bipolar Disorder Type 1 and have been through a lot, so I decided it's time to express it. I also have a degree in mental health so these issues are important to me. I am also a lesbian, married to a wonderful woman. LGBT issues and rights are also in my advocacy docket. I'm eccentric & I like to have fun, so I thank you for tuning into my new blog.